Marty’s Better

Talented 24 year old Pierre-Marc Bouchard and the Minnesota Wild avoided their arbitration hearing on Monday by signing a 5 year deal worth $20.4 million dollars, including a 2 year no trade clause.

Here is a look at what the Wrink at Wrigley will look like.  This will be a lot of fun!!

He can’t skate.  He doesn’t hit.  He has the scoring touch of Bob Probert.  The best part of his game is his ability to elbow opposing forwards.  Yet for some reason, the Charlotte Checkers are gonna be stuck with Huge Specimen Hugh Jessiman this year.  I know it sounds harsh, but the kid the Rangers took 12th overall in 2003 when they could’ve had Zach Parise, Ryan Getzlaf, or heck, even Nick Tarnasky (287th overall), has been nothing short of a huge specimen disappointment.  Why they would even waste money to re-sign him completely blows my mind.  But heck, the Rangers are great at overpaying for 2nd line, above average, complimentary players and making them attempt to play top line hockey, i.e. Bobby Holik, Chris Drury.  So why not give a kid whose only shot at wearing a Ranger jersey came on draft day a new deal?  Terms were not disclosed, so I’m guessing they gave him a 5 year $25 million deal.  

The Devils have signed the hockey version of Frank Stallone.  That’s right, 27 year old Fedor Fedorov, the player so nice he was drafted twice, is headed to New Jersey.  First of all, who names their kid Fedor if their last name is Fedorov?  Fedor Tyutin is one thing, but Fedor Fedorov?  Were the parents so busy with Sergei that they couldn’t come up with a proper name for the kid?  Anyway, in 18 NHL games, he has 2 assists and 14 penalty minutes.  He wears number 81, which continues the Fedorov family tradition of wearing the same number as your player rating on EA’s NHL series.  Oh, happy day in Newark, and probably at some point, Lowell. 

Jonathan Toews  will serve as the Blackhawks captain next season, making him the third-youngest player to earn that distinction in the history of the NHL. Continue Reading »

The Sabres have locked up Ryan Miller with a 5 year extension worth around 30 million.

Detroit Red Wings forward Dallas Drake announced his retirement Tuesday a month after raising the Stanley Cup for the first time in his 16-year career. The 39-year-old Drake had 177 goals, 300 assists and 885 penalty minutes in 1,009 regular-season games. He had 14 goals, 19 assists and 79 penalty minutes in 90 playoff games.

Well, if that dojo is Madison Square Garden, apparently the answer is “No Sensei!”  The Rangers dealt Ryan Hollweg to the Make Believes Maple Leafs for a 5th round pick Toronto had previously acquired from Pittsburgh in the Hal Gill trade.  After the jump, my thoughts.

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Ted Nolan’s two-year stint as Islanders head coach ended Monday.  Irreconcilable differences over the direction of the franchise led to a mutual decision by general manager Garth Snow and Nolan. Continue Reading »

there’s a joke here somewhere